Over the course of our vanity years – that is the last 50 or so because before then I think people were just trying to get through the day – we have abhorred all the macros at some point.
First, we had a long idiotic era of fat making you fat and thus to go low fat cos, well it makes sense right – after all, it is the same word, just a shame it means something completely different.
Fat as a macro is not the same as the fat in my ass, unless my ass is made from avocados and nuts… and that would be delish, but it’s not and thus my ass is not so tasty.
Then we banished protein and vegetarians became the rage but it just wasn’t enough of a sacrifice and so vegans reared their glorious heads … and promptly let the rest of the world know about their sacrifice too. Okay you can find protein in other sources I get it but there is no need to be quite so sanctimonious about the whole thing.
The war still rages strong today and while it may work for some, it just doesn’t work for others… and it most certainly doesn’t work for cats … those of you who only feed your cats lettuce are simply damaged in the head – this is actually a scientific fact… or personal opinion, sorry I easily confuse the two.
Then more recently we decided to shoot down the lonely carb – that dastardly fiend making us fat … or is the excessive consumption of said carb that makes us so rotund…
So, I’d like to try to bring peace upon the macros, they are not at fault here, they are not the villain in this sordid tale. It’s not them making you fat … it’s you that’s making you fat.
What to do and where the hell do I start?
Well firstly, can I just say, that as you sit here reading this life-changing masterpiece, how wonderful you are. You are so unique, there is simply no one else quite like you, literally, even as a twin, you still have your uniqueness. So, you have to think of yourself as unique. What worked for your friend, your neighbor, your mum or your brother doesn’t mean it’ll work for you. You have to know this. Once you understand life ain’t fair and the world is mean the sooner we can move on and deal with the finger of blame.
You have to stop pointing the finger of blame outwards and turn it back on yourself. Unless you’re being tied down and force-fed, against your will, you have to accept that the shape you are in is on you. Nope, not because mum makes too much delicious food and the kids are starving in Africa so you have to finish your plate, or because you don’t want to waste your takeaway chow mein, or it’s against the rules to go light on an eat all you can buffet.
If you are the one putting the food in your mouth then you are the one in charge, not the one making it, delivering it, or paying for it… if it’s your hand, then it’s you!!!
The tragic fact of the matter is that we all know that we get fat from simply eating too much.
It boils down to this.
You consume too much energy!
Job done. The reason you have excess body fat on you, is because you just consume too much food. Let’s not get too much into the weeds just yet. You just eat more than you need to. You can blame carbs, you can blame fats you can blame your parents and poor genes for all I care, what you need to blame is the hand that keeps stuffing food into your mouth.
Overconsumption is the problem.
When you over-consume anything, you will gain additional body fat.
It’s an energy issue. We all like to bash carbs lately and I understand why but carbohydrates are an awesome fuel for the body. They provide the body with glucose – which is great when you are exercising. Because they are such an awesome source of fuel, if you are not in the need of said fuel then carbohydrates are therefore not overly that imperative to your diet.
You don’t need gasoline if you ride a bike!
Your choice of food and the amount of food you eat needs to be revised.
We are all aware or should be aware of the trouble with processed foods. They just taste so yummy. But that is their design! Processed foods are designed to trick your brain by changing your brain chemistry to make you eat more. Who in their right mind only eats half a tub of pringles … just while we are here if you do triumphantly chow down a whole packet of pringles, that is the equivalent to 6 packets of crisps … and you wonder why your belly jiggles when you run to the 7-11!
These processed foods are made for what we call passive overconsumption. You’ll just keep snacking on them if you leave them sat next to you. Salted popcorn Vs normal… the combination of fat butter and salt will make you easily chow down a super-size portion over the course of a 2-hour movie (usually before it even starts). The ticket may only cost you $10 but the popcorn just cost you a 1000 calories homie.
There’s a Party in my Belly!
When we are full, our stomach signals the brain that we are good. But when we are eating fatty, carby processed foods, our brain kinda just ignores those signals – they’re just too yummy.
No matter how full you get at a restaurant there is always room for cheesecake – even if just a couple bites… but over the course of waiting for your friends to finish, you’ll have another nibble here and a little nibble there, and before you know it boom, you just added 500 calories to what was already a stuffed belly. And you wonder why your cheeks are so cute and chubby all the time!
High energy processed food dominates the market. But when you don’t have time in your day to utilize that newly consumed energy, it goes to the pantry shelves to be stored… that’s my polite way of the energy being stored on your ass as fat.
But that’s not to say if you train hard you can eat shit. I mean you can get away with it I guess, but it’s not the right mindset that you want to be having here.
Moderation is the key
Obviously, if you train your level of moderation will be somewhat higher than someone who doesn’t, but it doesn’t mean you can justify eating crap because you lift bro.
Reducing your carbohydrates would be a strong suggestion if you don’t exercise. I mean I would have to question as to why you are eating carbs in the first place if you have no intention to consume them.
People who eat low carbs and lose weight start to think of carbs as bad. No. Carbs are fuel. If you exercise regularly and chose to eat a paleo or low carb diet you will eventually stall on your training.
Your Thyroid levels drop, your metabolism slows down and your testosterone will begin to plunge. Your cortisol (stress hormone) will go up as your immune system becomes suppressed.
This is what I call collectively as a whole bag of fun.
It will feel like you have hit a wall. For the majority of people – as there are always exceptions to the rule (who then go and write books) who thrive but most people simply cannot train 4-6 hours a week on a low carb diet. It makes no sense. I am here utilizing fuel but I am refusing to put fuel in my body!! Face Palm!!
Training regularly on low to no carbs is like trying to drive a car with no fuel.
You have just become a Flintstone
To continue to part II here